Top 3 things to look for in a person

The most commendable way to lead a virtuous life free from immorality and emotional inhibitions is to marry, according to the Holy Qur'an. Islam stresses people marry to lead a life of peace, love, support, and comfort. As mentioned in the Holy Quran:

“And one of His signs is that he created mates for you from yourselves that you may find rest in them, and He put between you love and compassion; most surely there are signs in this for a people who reflect.”(30:21)

So when the time comes, to help you follow the Sunnah, here are the top three things to look for in a person for marriage. Remember, these qualities are in addition to Iman and character, that are indispensable for marriage. 

1. Communication

We cannot put enough stress on the importance of communication skills for a healthy marital life. No one is perfect, and as is the nature of other human relationships, moments of conflict also arise between husband and wife. Having strong communication skills is the key to handling disagreement. 

Islam puts manners at a high place amongst the qualities it wants to see in its followers. It spans from interacting with your coworkers and neighbors to treating your family with kindness. Ibn Abbas R.A narrated that the Prophet SAW said: 

“The best of you are the best to their families, and I am the best to my family.” (Sunan At-Tirmizi)

At another point, Abu Hurairah R.A narrated that the Prophet SAW said: 

“The most complete of the believers in faith, is the one with the best of character. And the best of you are those who are best to their women.” (Sunan At-Tirmizi)

Remember, communication is a skill you can develop with time and effort. Moreover, when it comes to communication, both parties must play their part in establishing healthy routines and being conscious of their shortcomings. 

2. Commitment

Commitment is what gets you through challenging situations in life. A relationship built on the strong foundations of commitment can stand the test of time. It’s a thoughtful investment from both ends. If one of the partners is not playing their role with devotion and honesty, it can negatively impact the relationship. 

Commitment is fueled by the reasons two people enter this lifelong contract. Thus marrying for the right reasons is essential for its success. Marrying because of pressure from society, family, and other external reasons would lay a weak marriage. The prophet SAW said: 

“A man who marries a woman for the sake of her wealth, Allah leaves him in his condition, and the one who marries her (only) for her beauty, he will find in her (things) which he dislikes (displeasing matters) and the one who marries her for the sake of her faith (religiousness), Allah will gather up all these things for him.”

3. Emotional Intelligence

Emotions are powerful, and having the ability to identify and manage them is called emotional intelligence. It also leads to effective communication and a healthy bond among spouses. Emotional intelligence allows couples to provide a safe place for each other. And people can better regulate their emotions and understand others’ emotions. 

Empathy is a central element of emotional intelligence. A person with the capacity for empathy can show compassion, kindness, and consideration of the next person’s feelings. 

With emotional intelligence, you can anticipate your spouse’s needs, give them attention and turn to them for emotional support. Instead of looking for external validations, you go to your spouse. You can also take care of your own emotions and better regulate them. It lends you clarity on what you are expecting from your spouse and how to better communicate your needs with them.  

Finding the person you can share your life with is a difficult feat. But the Proposal gives you control over this choice. The Proposal Halal Muslim Marriage App allows you to connect with the most compatible proposal in a free, fast, and easy way. It offers matches based on your personality, and you have 48 hours to break the ice, after which each match expires. Try the fantastic features today and see for yourself!